After watching the movie, the group went to a barbecue restaurant in the mall to eat. Lin Shiyu was still resentful about Zhong Qi taking a screenshot of him wearing the strawberry hairpin, so he didn’t want to sit next to him during dinner. Yet, whether intentionally or not, Zhong Qi not only sat opposite him but also reached over to grab the grilled meat from in front of him.

Every time Lin Shiyu reached for the meat, Zhong Qi was one step ahead. After several attempts, Lin Shiyu couldn’t take it anymore and almost flipped the table in anger. He was only calmed down by Mao Silu and Gao Jie, who persuaded and hugged him and filled a bowl with grilled meat for him, barely pacifying his anger.

As they finished their meal and prepared to go their separate ways, everyone bid farewell. Tao Chen and Shen Ziyi walked home together.

Tao Chen suddenly spoke up. “Ziyi, don’t you think Zhong Qi and Shiyu have a special relationship?”

“Ah? Are you sure?” Shen Ziyi asked.

“I feel like Shiyu’s temper has improved since the beginning of the school year. He’s not as indifferent to everyone as before.”

“That’s true, but what does it have to do with Brother Zhong?”

“Don’t you think Zhong Qi treats him differently from the others?” Tao Chen said. “Zhong Qi is actually quite aloof, treating everyone the same, except he likes to tease Shiyu. Do you remember during PE class, when you and Shiyu were chatting together? Zhong Qi came over and said he needed to talk to you.”

Shen Ziyi definitely remembered. She had eagerly rushed to find Tao Chen with fried chicken in hand, but when they met, both of them were confused because Tao Chen hadn’t been looking for her.

Tao Chen continued, “When you told me about it, I found it quite strange. Zhong Qi was fine, so why did he want to send you away?”

The two girls glanced at each other.

Shen Ziyi tried to regain her composure. “No, no, no, don’t you like Zhong Qi? Why are you analyzing his relationship with Brother Shiyu?”

Tao Chen’s gaze dimmed for a moment. She and Shen Ziyi had talked about many topics, most of which centered around Zhong Qi. Shen Ziyi encouraged her to confess, but Tao Chen had been hesitating until now, lacking the courage to do so.

Zhong Qi was too unpredictable. The uncertainties of a secret crush were already enough to make her anxious, and she always hoped to find something to look forward to in Zhong Qi’s gaze and behavior, but she was always disappointed.

“It’s because I like him, I’m observing carefully…” Tao Chen muttered softly to herself, sounding a bit disheartened.

When Shen Ziyi returned home, surprisingly her dad was also there, standing on the balcony making a phone call.

“Getting sentenced is just a matter of time. Not just him, but none of those buddies from the studio can escape. Now we’re just waiting for the prosecution’s appeal, then we’ll see how many years they’ll be sentenced to… I told you this had to be blown up. Do you think those reporters hanging around our office are just for show? It’s the modern age, who wants to protect him anyway…

“The evidence is all there, isn’t it? With the uproar on the internet before, it wouldn’t be appropriate to cover it up further.

“You talk as if I don’t have a precious daughter at home. Who wouldn’t want him to rot in jail forever? Alright, alright, if the sentence is light, we’ll invite a few old comrades to beat him up first….”

He turned back, holding a cigarette, and met his “precious daughter’s” eyes.

Shen Ziyi squinted at her dad, teasingly. Her dad reluctantly stubbed out the cigarette, then walked over to pat Shen Ziyi’s head. “Eavesdropping on your old man’s phone call?”

Shen Ziyi followed her dad into the kitchen, curious. “Dad, were you talking about that perverted photographer from last year’s photo studio?”

“He’s even been given a nickname.”

“Hmph, he was a pervert to begin with.”

“His case has entered the legal process, now we are waiting for sentencing.”

“Dad, were you in charge of that case before? Why didn’t you mention it to me?”

Shen Quan rolled up his sleeves and squatted on the stool to pick vegetables. Upon hearing this, he said, “I’m busy every day, where do I have time to chat with you? Come over and help me with the vegetables.”

“Oh.” Shen Ziyi didn’t think much about it and moved a small stool over to help with the vegetables. As she did, she said indignantly, “People like that are just animals, they have no humanity. It would be better if they could be sentenced to death.”

“It’s not so easy to sentence someone to death. You seem to be quite ignorant about the law.”

“Ignorant?” Shen Ziyi slapped her thigh in dissatisfaction. “Just the thought of such people living around us is disgusting and terrifying! So many innocent girls have their lives ruined by him, why should he be allowed to live? It’s really a waste for his parents to have brought him into this world, hmph.”

“There are too many unfair things in this world. There are plenty of scoundrels raised by irresponsible parents too. A few years ago, I heard about a case from another jurisdiction, where a father was trying to throw his young daughter into the river in the middle of the night. If it weren’t for others stopping him, the girl would have been gone.”

“That’s too…”

“I’m telling you this not to make you cynical, but to make you aware of the danger and to be vigilant at all times,” Shen Quan said. “I’m not saying you can’t draw or play with your phone, I just want you to pay more attention to what’s going on around you and protect yourself, understand?”

Shen Quan was usually busy and didn’t communicate much with Shen Ziyi, but whenever he had the chance, he felt it necessary to give his daughter some lessons. Shen Ziyi became dispirited whenever her dad started lecturing her with high-sounding principles, and began lazily shelling peas. “Got it.”

“Be a bit quicker, your mom will be back from work soon.”

“I got it!”

Shen Ziyi diligently peeled half a basket of peas, and at that moment, the usually talkative girl suddenly quieted down.

After a while, Shen Ziyi spoke up. “Dad, I have a question for you.”

“Go ahead.”

“If… there’s a boy who’s always getting into fights, has a bad temper, but also wears… girls’ clothes,” Shen Ziyi tried to describe. “Do you think such a person might have psychological problems?”

Then she quickly added, “Recently, his temper has improved a bit.”

Shen Quan, standing in front of the cutting board with an apron on, asked, “Do you want to be friends with him?”

“Well… I kind of do.”

“If you want to be friends with him, then there must be something about him that attracts you. A person’s appearance is just superficial. Even if he wears a dress every day, your focus shouldn’t be on the dress but on the person himself,” Shen Quan said to Shen Ziyi. “Why does he get into fights? Why does he wear girls’ clothes? You need to understand the reasons first before making a judgment about him. Don’t just label others based on first impressions, just how you don’t like it when others do the same to you.”

Shen Ziyi nodded reluctantly. “Oh.”

As time passed, Shen Ziyi gradually forgot to explore the reasons behind why Lin Shiyu had a bad temper and wore girls’ clothes. Perhaps for others, it was the same, as long as they could play and have fun together happily, many details no longer needed to be deeply investigated.

Today, Shen Ziyi suddenly realized that by asking a question like “Could he be someone with psychological problems?” she had actually mentally labeled Lin Shiyu in that way.

Whether intentionally or unintentionally, they had both chosen to ignore certain things that required patience and perseverance to explore in this seemingly smoothly progressing friendship game. Enjoying the lively atmosphere was simple, but thinking and conversing were difficult.

Shen Ziyi belatedly realized a fact: perhaps they had all selectively ignored the real Lin Shiyu.

When Lin Shiyu returned home, the living room was pitch black, with only the bedroom door left open and the light on.

Lin Shiyu changed into slippers and walked over. Lin Hui was teaching Lin Wanyue to do her winter holiday homework at the table. Upon hearing the movement, she turned around and smiled. “Brother’s back.”

The little girl also looked over and echoed her mother’s words: “Brother’s back.”

Lin Shiyu responded with a grunt and went to his own room to get changed before taking a shower.

After finishing his shower and changing into pajamas, he came out and went to the kitchen to pour himself a glass of water. Lin Hui was also in the kitchen, preparing milk for him and Lin Wanyue.

As Lin Hui scooped the milk powder, her hand accidentally shook, sprinkling some on the floor. She grabbed a cloth and crouched down to clean it up carefully, wiping the floor clean before standing up.

Before she could fully stand up, her body swayed.

Lin Shiyu was nearby and quickly supported her, furrowing his brows and asking, “What’s wrong?”

“I feel a bit dizzy when I stand up.” Lin Hui smiled. Her complexion was as pale as ever, showing signs of chronic anemia. The sleep robe hung loosely on her slender frame, unable to fill it out.

Lin Hui had been suffering from anemia for a long time, especially in the past two years. While she had been under a lot of stress and pressure, her condition hadn’t improved. Lin Shiyu didn’t say anything, took the spoon from her hand, and said, “I’ll do it, you go rest.”

Lin Hui didn’t argue with him about this and returned to her room. Lin Shiyu prepared two cups of milk for himself and his sister, and then took Lin Hui’s cup from the side and poured an extra cup of milk.

Carrying two steaming cups of milk, when Lin Shiyu entered the room. Lin Hui was still gently teaching Lin Wanyue how to read. Lin Wanyue sometimes followed along with indistinct words, or sometimes just responding with an “mm,” quite perfunctory.

Lin Shiyu walked over and placed the two cups of milk on the table. Lin Hui saw her own cup and asked, “Is this mine?”

“Uh.”

“Why am I still drinking milk, what a waste.”

“To supplement nutrition.” Lin Shiyu felt annoyed when she said such things. He furrowed his brow, dropped that sentence, and then said to his sister, “Lin Wanyue, go to bed early.”

Lin Wanyue nodded” “Okay!”

Lin Shiyu did his homework in his room for a while. Later he heard a slight movement from the opposite bedroom, the murmuring voices gradually faded away, followed by a soft click as the light was turned off.

Lin Shiyu put down his pen, turned off the desk lamp, and pulled the covers to climb into bed.

His mood worsened again. A nameless fire burned in his chest, looking for an outlet. Just like usual, his emotions fluctuate easily, getting angry over trivial matters, unable to care about anything else when he gets angry.

Before his mom and that man divorced, Lin Shiyu had once had an unprecedented conflict with him. At that time, all the contradictions between everyone had reached a peak. Every past beating, insult, drunkenness, threat, and intimidation had already twisted Lin Shiyu into an extremely aggressive blade, and under the catalysis of repeated conflicts, they finally converged into the most serious eruption. That day, when Lin Wanyue wasn’t at home, Lin Shiyu smashed everything in the house that could be smashed—vases, coffee tables, TVs, dining tables, chairs, cabinets storing bowls and plates—everything was smashed to pieces. Lin Shiyu, driven mad by anger, was kicked into the wall by the man, almost unable to stand up. The next moment, he threw himself at the man in a frenzy, amidst the sound of shattered glass.

In the end, it was Lin Hui and Lin Wanyue’s Aunt and Uncle who rushed in to separate the two crazed individuals. The floor was already covered in mottled bloodstains, some belonging to Lin Shiyu, some to the man. In the chaos, no one looked dignified. Lin Shiyu hardly remembered whether he had felt pain at the time; his resentment burned his blood and congested his brain, all his senses drifting away from him.

He only remembered his mom almost collapsing and rushing over to embrace him, crying and saying, “Don’t be like this, don’t make yourself covered in wounds.”

Yet who wasn’t? They had already been scarred inside and out, and while the physical scars could heal, the scars on their hearts from being cut by knives could never close. The man had planted indelible shadows in his, his mom’s, and his sister’s hearts, and he would hate the man for the rest of his life, forever living in the darkness of his existence.

Lin Shiyu buried his head in the covers, habitually curling up in the corner of the bed, his forehead lightly pressed against the cold wall, closing his eyes.

Everything changed after his sister was born. If the so-called dad he had before was just annoying because of his alcoholism and brutality, when Lin Wanyue came into this world, everyone’s lives plunged into an endless nightmare.

His mom used to be gentle, beautiful, timid but smiling, always trying to please her irritable husband. Even after his sister was born, she continued to tolerate the man’s increasingly violent and terrifying temper, hoping that one day he would wake up and look back at his wife and children.

That day never came. Every day a woman endured, Lin Shiyu and Lin Wanyue suffered increasingly senseless beatings and insults. Sometimes Lin Shiyu would even blame her. He hated her for being so weak, for expecting the existence of something illusory, for desperately avoiding reality, letting him and his sister bear the consequences of her mistakes.

He often had nightmares, where the man abused them, and upon waking up, he begged his mom to take them away, but the woman only cried and hugged him, stroking him, unable to say that she would take them away.

It was as if in that moment, Lin Shiyu saw his mom aging, her beautiful face no longer existing, leaving only a pale, withered shell, permeated with helplessness and sadness.

Lin Shiyu understood then that she was a mother, isolated and helpless.

From then on, he would be their spear and shield.

 

 

 

Edited by: Jaisland

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